21. senior. new blog. new patty. im trying to find out who i really am. i want to be better. i want to be the person i know i am. God has such a big plan for me and i will not let myself ruin it. i love my friends. i love my family. i am trying hard to be the patty means i was but making sure i stay the person i am. i do not need negativity. i cant say dont judge me because i do not have that power. this is my outlet and you can do what youd like with it. this one is different. i will be different.

sometimes i wish i had a boyfriend. 

i deny it alot of the time because im afraid of rejection and ending up alone. but i just dont know. i am fully content loving myself and being in love with Jesus Christ and knowing how much he loves me and feeling that…but sometimes it would be nice to have that special someone. 

someone to tell me im beautiful, take me on special dates, buy me flowers, just hangout. idk. i was asked tonight why i dont have “a boo” yet and i didnt really have a good answer other than the typical one of “oh just dont want one…” 

i am just afraid that once they see past my pretty face and quick whit theyll lose interest or want just the physical stuff and i cant put my heart into another relationship just to be treated like trash. like im not even a person.

if you know any good christian men out there…lookin for a lady :) here i am. 

but for now…ill just love the lord and know that he loves me and for now…that is exactly what i want and need. 

1 note
Posted on Thursday, 9 February

1. reverofuoyevoli posted this